When You’re a Knitter With Half a Brain… Just Knit


I’m a knitter. I’m other things too but knitting is my default mode. When I feel good, I knit. When I feel bad I knit. When I’m high on anti-histamines, I knit. Today I’m the high on anti-histamines knitter so let me apologize in advance for excessive rambling.

Poison Ivy is evil. I’m very allergic to it. I don’t have to come into contact with an actual plant. I can get a poison ivy rash from residual oils left on tables and chairs and door knobs. It turns out I can also pick it up on the backs on my legs when I wear shorts and sit down in a chair. Ugh.

Now if you’re the kind sort of soul that is rushing to type out a loving message full of advice let me just add… this happens to me a lot. Its my second outbreak this summer. I’m an old pro at dealing with poison ivy. Everyone has their own remedies and here is mine:

  • Drink lots of water. Being hydrated helps skin heal and that might not give you immediate relief but its vital to long-term recovery.
  • Those poison ivy scrubs from the drug store are worth their weight in gold
  • Vinegar is great for getting under your skin and drying up those itchy, burning bumps. Take baths in the stuff.
  • Benadryl will save your life, or at least your sanity. The rash is not really poison, its just an allergic reaction. Some people can wade through fields of poison ivy and not break out at all (and we hate those people with the power of a thousand suns). With modern chemistry you can temporarily turn yourself into one of those people.

Where was I going with this?

Oh yeah.

So I’m at home (no driving allowed) and high on anti-histamines. Those babies make me dizzy. But they keep me from scratching my skin off so its okay. I’ll just sit and knit on this hat.

knitting a hat

Isn’t that pretty yarn? I got it from an indie dyer who has since quit dying yarn to go back to college. Pffftt. College. Plenty of people can suffer through college. How many can make a yarn with this kind of crazy pooling?

I got up this morning looking forward to two things: my next benadryl pill and knitting this hat. I usually do wake up thinking about what I will knit or crochet or spin. Its what I look forward to the most. Does that make me a dull person? Maybe. Probably. By most of the world’s standards I’m pretty dull. I can’t seem to care much though.

The last guy I dated told me I was cute and sexy and just beautiful. Nice right? But he also wanted to know if I always wore jeans and boots. Did I ever wear dresses? Did I own any high heeled shoes? Did I like to go out dancing? Did I know that there is a new movie coming out where Batman thinks Superman is a bad guy and decides to take him out? And did I always go by “Jenn”? Wouldn’t it be awesome if everyone called me “JZ” instead?

Yeah sure. I may be over 40 but I totally ready to learn how to walk in high heels and while wearing a tiny little dress to the premier of the newest comic-book-turned-movie and forcing all of my friends to call me by a new nickname that makes me sound like a wanna-be pop star. Or, you know, I could just never go on another date with that guy.

(Are the movie people really making Superman into a bad guy? Never mind. I don’t care enough to actually find out.)

S’ok. I’m happier at home knitting. No really, it is perfectly okay. I was never serious about that guy. I never even bothered to introduce him to The Feline Overlord.

I’m pretty sure they, Feline Overlord and the guy, would not have gotten along. If you are not willing to drop everything and make her the center of your universe then she doesn’t much like you. But she is a sweetie at heart. She seems to be able to tell that I’m not feeling my best because she is sticking close, following me around, and keeping me company.

kitty napping posistions

By the way, how do cats do this? How do they manage to lay on both sides of their body at the same time? Looks really uncomfortable!

But I got distracted again. I was talking about being dull. I am. I’m so dull that I find myself being endlessly entertained by the smallest of things. Like watching the colors in this hat come up.

knitting hand dyed yarn

The yarn is making these little plum stripes in the green and always in sets of three. They keep turning up. I think that’s just charming.

Yeah, I’m pretty dull alright. Remember Bert of Bert&Ernie? Remember how Bert was so very dull? How he was always “Doin’ the Pigeon”? That’s me. I’m Doin’ the Knitting.


PS. For those of you too young to remember Doin’ the Pigeon….

“oh wow!”

“now this exciting”

“look at the one with the feathers”

Me and Bert don’t care if you think we’re dull. We too busy being happy, dull, dorks to really notice.


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17 Comments on "When You’re a Knitter With Half a Brain… Just Knit"

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Barbara Krooss

Wow! Those are the exact colors that poison ivy turns in autumn. Perfect project to anticipate the season…I’m just itching to knit something like that.


You are evil. Clever, witty and sharp as a whip! But evil.

I can’t even hear the word “itch” right now with out itching.


My sympathies. Middle son is as allergic to poison ivy as you are. His problem is that he loves to hike in the woods. Ergo has ended up with at least one case that nearly caused a hospital trip, from inhaling the pollen. Feel better soon!

My go to to heal skin rashes, learned from a doctor friend, is raw honey. Heals when nothing else will.

And you were smart to dump the guy!????


Good thing I’m tough! Or something.


WOW!!! I didn’t know Bert had legs–and could dance! The Pigeon! Jenn, you and Bert made my day. I’ll be smiling and humming that song the rest of the day. And spinning some gorgeous merino by Malabrigo. I guess I’m another happy dullard. My black cat has white spots under his arms also. Sorry about your poison ivy rash; I had that once – it’s nasty. I guess this rambling post will make sense to you today in your current state of mind.


lolol Yep, Bert had legs and he was a wonderful dancer! Not much of a singer though.

I’ve played with that fiber from Malabrigo myself. its as soft as butter. Very yummy stuff.


I’m glad that you have something to make you feel better. I love the yarn! The colors are spectacular. You don’t have to exciting by others’ standards. Being passionate and committed to knit and crochet is just fine and dandy.


Good thing. That’s its fine and dandy (I mean) because I can’t seem to work up the motivation to be interesting in any other way.

I do love that yarn. It like all the colors got together and had a party.

old crazy hooks

Benadryl is almost as good a drug as playing with yarn — I’m a crocheter like you’re a knitter (ahem). And I’m commiserating with you as a fellow PI sufferer, to a lesser degree, although I have experienced getting PI from petting my dog (pout: betrayed by love!) And I spent some time having spontaneous histamine reactions to just about everything, the only solution to which is to snack on anti-histamines.
All this to say, a Benadryl drip is a wonderful thing, on the day you need it.


I’ve never had to be on a Benadryl IV but i can imagine. And I too have picked up PI from petting dogs. Sad. I still pet them though.


Oh yes pioson ivy is the spawn of the devil! I too am HIGHLY sensitve to it. You have my deepest sympathies. Thanks fot the vinegar tip. Never tried it . The yarn is just stunning and it does have the colors of PI in the fall. Love to see a pic of the finished hat. Maybe you could call it Jenn’s Poison Ivy Hat. (Giggle). You’re lucky that your feline companion is just following and staying close. When I feel bad mine want to be ON me. Got to love them. Enjoy the benadryl.


Thanks. While I appreciate all feedback from my lovely readers… I’m not naming it the Poison Ivy Hat. Shudder. Too many bad associations!

And kitties. Gotta love them. And feed them. And put up with their many demands. I’m typing this out one handed because my other is occupied being a pillow for a kitty head.