I’m a knitter. I’m other things too but knitting is my default mode. When I feel good, I knit. When I feel bad I knit. When I’m high on anti-histamines, I knit. Today I’m the high on anti-histamines knitter so let me apologize in advance for excessive rambling.

Poison Ivy is evil. I’m very allergic to it. I don’t have to come into contact with an actual plant. I can get a poison ivy rash from residual oils left on tables and chairs and door knobs. It turns out I can also pick it up on the backs on my legs when I wear shorts and sit down in a chair. Ugh.

Now if you’re the kind sort of soul that is rushing to type out a loving message full of advice let me just add… this happens to me a lot. Its my second outbreak this summer. I’m an old pro at dealing with poison ivy. Everyone has their own remedies and here is mine:

• Drink lots of water. Being hydrated helps skin heal and that might not give you immediate relief but its vital to long-term recovery.
• Those poison ivy scrubs from the drug store are worth their weight in gold
• Vinegar is great for getting under your skin and drying up those itchy, burning bumps. Take baths in the stuff.
• Benadryl will save your life, or at least your sanity. The rash is not really poison, its just an allergic reaction. Some people can wade through fields of poison ivy and not break out at all (and we hate those people with the power of a thousand suns). With modern chemistry you can temporarily turn yourself into one of those people.

Where was I going with this?

Oh yeah.

So I’m at home (no driving allowed) and high on anti-histamines. Those babies make me dizzy. But they keep me from scratching my skin off so its okay. I’ll just sit and knit on this hat.

Isn’t that pretty yarn? I got it from an indie dyer who has since quit dying yarn to go back to college. Pffftt. College. Plenty of people can suffer through college. How many can make a yarn with this kind of crazy pooling?

I got up this morning looking forward to two things: my next benadryl pill and knitting this hat. I usually do wake up thinking about what I will knit or crochet or spin. Its what I look forward to the most. Does that make me a dull person? Maybe. Probably. By most of the world’s standards I’m pretty dull. I can’t seem to care much though.

The last guy I dated told me I was cute and sexy and just beautiful. Nice right? But he also wanted to know if I always wore jeans and boots. Did I ever wear dresses? Did I own any high heeled shoes? Did I like to go out dancing? Did I know that there is a new movie coming out where Batman thinks Superman is a bad guy and decides to take him out? And did I always go by “Jenn”? Wouldn’t it be awesome if everyone called me “JZ” instead?

Yeah sure. I may be over 40 but I totally ready to learn how to walk in high heels and while wearing a tiny little dress to the premier of the newest comic-book-turned-movie and forcing all of my friends to call me by a new nickname that makes me sound like a wanna-be pop star. Or, you know, I could just never go on another date with that guy.

(Are the movie people really making Superman into a bad guy? Never mind. I don’t care enough to actually find out.)

S’ok. I’m happier at home knitting. No really, it is perfectly okay. I was never serious about that guy. I never even bothered to introduce him to The Feline Overlord.

I’m pretty sure they, Feline Overlord and the guy, would not have gotten along. If you are not willing to drop everything and make her the center of your universe then she doesn’t much like you. But she is a sweetie at heart. She seems to be able to tell that I’m not feeling my best because she is sticking close, following me around, and keeping me company.

By the way, how do cats do this? How do they manage to lay on both sides of their body at the same time? Looks really uncomfortable!

But I got distracted again. I was talking about being dull. I am. I’m so dull that I find myself being endlessly entertained by the smallest of things. Like watching the colors in this hat come up.

The yarn is making these little plum stripes in the green and always in sets of three. They keep turning up. I think that’s just charming.

Yeah, I’m pretty dull alright. Remember Bert of Bert&Ernie? Remember how Bert was so very dull? How he was always “Doin’ the Pigeon”? That’s me. I’m Doin’ the Knitting.

PS. For those of you too young to remember Doin’ the Pigeon….

“oh wow!”

“now this exciting”

“look at the one with the feathers”

Me and Bert don’t care if you think we’re dull. We too busy being happy, dull, dorks to really notice.