Stop me if you’ve heard this before:
“I just don’t have the patience for that crochet stuff.”
Or maybe it sounded like this:
“I’d love to knit but I don’t have that kind of free time.”
Yeah. There are many, many people in this world who could totally make gorgeous yarn-y creations like we do but sadly, their lives are too exciting for such pursuits. They are too busy. They are fulfilling some vitally important function in society and just can’t make time for something frivolous like knitting.
Me? I’m frivolously knitting up a pair of fingerless mitts from a ball of Chroma in colorway seafoam (which I think has been discontinued). I’ve also been cheating on it here and there with headbands and coin purses. Really, I must have all the time in the world because I seem to have a different project in every room of my home and every bag I carry around. Being a hard-core knitter means that I have so much patience its leaking out of my ears, right?
So in between whiling away my endless free hours on a pair of fingerless gloves, I managed to get a label stitched on to my Pie Are Square shawl…
… and get to the post office to ship it to my mom.
I was only the fourth person in line at the post office that morning. Still, it took 35 minutes to get to the counter. I spent those 35 minutes awkwardly knitting a few rounds. Everyone else who was standing in that line stared at their phone/fussed at their fidgety children/glared at the postal workers/sighed a lot.
When my turn finally came, I tucked my green knitting away and presented my unsealed US Postal Service Approved Priority Mail box for inspection. Mr. Postal Worker told me it came with $50 of insurance. I said that was fine. He poked his grubby fingers in the box and stuffed the Pie Are Square shawl a little further down while asking me if I wanted to add more insurance. No, I said. Then he asked how much my package was worth.
I pasted a smile on my face and told him “Its priceless. Its a handmade shawl for my mother and no amount of insurance can replace it but $50 is fine.”
And here was his reply:
“Oh. Yeah. The last time I called my mother she was doing that,” pause while he waves his hands around in the air in a vague sort of way,”crochet thing. I don’t know how you all have the patience for that stuff.”
Which is how I found myself being paid one of those left-handed complements about my patience by a man who first made me wait 35 minutes to ship a package and then made me answer the same question three times in a row. By this time my smile was getting a little strained around the edges.
“Knitting and crochet is about finding the patience to deal with all the annoying crap in life,” I gritted out at him.
“Huh. So its like therapy? I never thought of it like that. That will be $9.95.”
I threw a ten dollar bill at him and walked away without loosing my temper. I had to find somewhere to sit and knit. I’m sure you understand. I took at least half an hour of impractical, time-wasting knitting after that encounter to face the next irritating thing coming my way.
I bet you a zillion dollars Mr. Postal Worker’s mother crochets ferociously after every one of his phone calls. Good thing she has plenty of free time.
"There is no failure. Only feedback." - Robert Allen
43 Comments on "When yarn makes the world suck less"
I have to go knit after just reading that. Well, that’s my story…
LOL!! I felt the same way and had to pull out the yarn over my lunch hour!!!!
And may you never run out of yarn. Because people like that are everywhere.
Today on an appointment I got to show off my crocheted shawl that I am working on. Inevitably when I get around others they just love to look at my creations and I do hear some doozies now and then on why they could never do that. Or the condescending male who can’t resist the comparison to their grandmothers or moms. Gotta love it.
Just smile through it all and try not to stab those people with any sharp implements!
I know just how you feel!!! I have to deal with those “stupid” people everyday and my crocheting at lunch time gives the therapy I need to keep going!!!!
Lunch break with yarn is how I often get though my day as well. How do people who don’t cope with the human race???
The stupidity is indeed everywhere. Also carelessness.
Patience is one of those things I never seem to have enough of. But playing with yarn helps. Its a distraction I guess.
Enjoy your yarn. And save me a beverage. Pls
Lol! I may not be patient but I am generous…… I’ll save you two! And let you sit in the comfy chair!
Sounds like a plan! I’ll be right over.
Oh yeah! I’ve heard that so many times, along with the comment (from my ex-brother-in-law) that he wished he’d gone to college and got his teaching license so he could have an easy job with nothing much to do.
Beware anyone who makes too majy excuses. I guess that is the lesson.
If I may? You’re ex brother in-law is an idiot! I come from a teaching family. I also despise the snide little remarks about how those that can’t do, teach. The world is full of imbeciles.
Yes I agree whole heartedly an I try to laugh it off but sometimes it’s isn’t easily smile an then they’ll thing your crazy or your up to something so!!Merry Christmas everyone an Happy New Years too
Instead of smiling, give ’em an evil, devilish grin as you cock one eyebrow up (ala Spock)…
really makes them nervous that you’re definitely up to no good and/or crazy as a loon! And if you make them nervous enough, maybe they’ll quit saying stupid things and leave you alone! Lol! Besides….. it’s fun!
I too expected to get better at dealing with the stupid with age. That didn’t happen. I also expected other people to acquire some manners with age. That didn’t happen either.
As a born and raised Northerner, I sometimes put on my Southern Belle and come out with a “bless your heart.” It confuses stupid people, but they know, somewhere down deep at the DNA level, that it’s not a good thing.
LOL! Good for you. Keep up the good work.
“Bless your heart” is a good one. I also like “Thank-you. Thank-you soooo much.” Those southern ladies can make insulting people an art form!
That’s so true! Depending on very slight variations in the tenor and tone in which you deliver the “Bless your heart” it can range in meaning all the way from “you have my deepest sympathies” to “You poor thing, your Mama dropped you on your head when you were a baby, didn’t she?”. Lol!
Yup been there too…. Lol